It’s closer to North Korea, whose idiot dictator apparently has targeted our fair village on the Texas Colorado for the reception of one of his new photoshopped ICBMs.
Perhaps he is enraged at Austin’s recent banning of plastic bags, which might be (unbeknownst to us all) a North Korean product? Presumably they produce something besides bombast, phony photographs and comical military uniforms.
Or is it that our Leftism is sullied by too many military retirees of a conservative bent? Fear not, Jong-un, their electoral power is negligible. In any case, the worm should turn his paper trajectories more to the northwest and bombard the more populated San Francisco. It is even less purely Socialistic, amply demonstrated by its unanimous support of gay marriage, surely a threat to manly Marxist paradises everywhere.
THE TEXAS SCRIBBLER 
Ah, yes, by all means.
Removing Austin is fine, except that it resides in Texas. Please allow Texans to do that on our own.
Perhaps if we could ship all the Austin freaks to Portland, Oregon, where they could feel at home. That would be partial revenge for having to absorb so many criminals from New Orleans after Katrina.
Ah, well, most of the New Orleans criminals went to Houston, which hardly noticed, I’m sure. Austin is overwhelmed with street beggars (the so-called “homeless”), a product of the liberal tendency to take indiscriminate pity. Years ago, I tried passing out cards to Caritas and the Sally, but got no takers. Can’t buy cigarettes or alcohol with cards.
Must be something personal with the current Kim. Or, maybe, his dad (granddad) got slighted by a man from Austin.
Or maybe SXSW refused to headline his band or show his documentary. Most likely he’s trying to show development of his photoshopped ICBM. Next time he’ll threaten Ohio and, finally, D.C.