Considering moving to Austin? Please don’t. Please don’t. If the scorpions, fire ants and six-inch roaches aren’t enough to scare you away, consider our traffic jams. They’re an all-day affair that often triples driving times.
I like to tell people that when I came back to Texas in 1978, I could drive Mopac, the north-south thoroughfare on Austin’s west side around 11 p.m. and be the only one on the road. I don’t remember when that ended. Probably some time in the late-80s. It’s long gone now.
About 1980, a native-Texan editor asked me, considering that developers were just beginning to stake out the desirable west side for new housing, what I though Austin traffic would be like in twenty years. New Jersey, I said, having recently left its bumper-to-bumper crawls. He scoffed.
He should have. I was off by a decade. What used to take me ten minutes now takes thirty. Mopac’s bumper-to-bumper crawl is normal. Once it speeds up, only a few idiots weave in and out of the lanes trying to make up lost time. Most drivers are careful and considerate. There’re just too damn many of them.