Mrs. Charm is on hospice care

Mrs. Charm has been in a steep decline since Oct. 13, her advanced cancer taking away her ability to think clearly and speak coherently. She has enormous trouble communicating with me and Mr. Boy, which causes her endless frustration. She’s fallen twice on her walker and is no longer able to stand, even with help.

On the 16th she said she knew she could not recover and she wanted to go with Hospice Austin’s care rather than suffer through another round of chemo. The stuff called R-CHOP she had last fall that helped her get into remission until July was nothing compared to the high-dose ones called RICE to fight her recurrent lymphoma. Two rounds of that in late August and late September cut her pretty low and caused scary neurological episodes each time. Recovery was hard, especially after she got the news Oct. 7 that it hadn’t worked and the cancer was steadily spreading.

Her M.D. Anderson doctor called Sunday to see what our situation was. He wasn’t surprised. Cancer moves fast, he said. “God bless you,” he concluded.

So Mrs. C. will stop taking the multiple pills she was on for various, presumably chemo-related problems such as a thyroid condition, and antibiotics to defeat possible infections from her weakened immune system. Now she will take only those drugs that will mask her pain to keep her as comfortable as possible. With hourly visits each day from Certified Nurses Aides to see to her hygiene and a weekly visit daily visits from a hospice nurse to monitor her condition.

And when the shut-down of one of her organs inevitably occurs, we’ll call the 24/7 hospice line instead of 9-1-1.

UPDATE:  Mrs. Charm, my wife Debra Ann Davis Stanley, passed away at 5 p.m. on Oct. 22 after a long and exhausting struggle with cancer. She was 55 years young.

8 responses to “Mrs. Charm is on hospice care

  1. God be with her………and you.

  2. I read your blog everyday and, therefore, have kept up with her condition. I am sorry.

  3. God bless you both, God is love; take comfort in each other and in God’s love. I don’t know you, but I love you.

  4. Damn. I could have missed this post and it wouldn’t have bothered me a bit.


  5. Terribly sorry to hear this. Then again, it sounds like she’s made her peace with the outcome, and if there truly is a next world, surely it must be a nicer place than what this one is trying to become.

  6. When it comes to the endgame, mere words are never adequate. My hope is Mrs Charm’s remaining days are filled with dignity, peace and the love of her family enveloping her.

    “When it comes to dying, we are all rookies.” Waylon Jennings said that.

  7. I don’t know you or your family personally, but you all have become a small part of my life through these writings. People never know just how many lives they touch and the loss affects them all. My heart goes out to you and your family. And remember, we the unknown readers love you guys…..